Changes

time after time after time

So much has already caused ruin in my life. Enough for me, who is not regretful and always moving on, to resent it. Enough reason for not forgiving myself. I let them happen.
It's as chaotic as the current political shit in this country I can't seem to own at the moment. It's too painful and absurd.
More so within myself.
I pray (as it is the only option I can count on, and always will be) that I get this over with as soon as I realized I've broken myself too many times to rectify what I've done to make this life more challenging than I should've.
Oh what ugly things I've done to make life beautiful. And how naturally it turned out to be how it's supposed to.